Justin Perry: The Assassin #02 - Vatican Kill

Justin Perry: The Assassin ran five total volumes from 1983 to 1985. The Pinnacle series was authored by George Harold “Hal” Bennett, an African-American writer that used the name John D. Revere. His other novels include This Passionate Land, a 1979 historical romance written under the pen name Harriet Janeway, and his satirical 1970 novel Lord of Dark Places. 

Missing the first book, I ventured into this bizarre men's action-adventure series with the sophomore effort Vatican Kill. In numerous backstories readers are brought up to speed on the titular hero. Justin Perry is a broad-shouldered, trim-waisted 36-year old assassin for the C.I.A.'s Death Squad. The terrorist organization he's been employed to fight is SADIF, which is fitting considering they murdered Justin's wife. As the book begins we learn that SADIF has launched Kill Venus, a spectacular attempt to destroy the planet with a missile. But, as Justin learns, this is just part of Bennett's insane plot. 

The second aspect of SADIF's Kill Venus part is to blow up the Vatican with 5,000 pounds of TNT. To kick off the fireworks, they plan on assassinating the King and Queen of Spain. Apparently this sequence of extraordinary events will launch Earth's Western Hemisphere into the Dark Ages. The whole operation is led by a pervert named Carl Werner, a Nazi that has catapulted himself into the limelight of various military and terrorist cells throughout the Cold War. Now he's planted in the Vatican as a Cardinal and it is up to Justin Perry to stop him.

As much as books like Roadblaster and TNT pushed the boundaries of over-the-top nonsense, Hal Bennett may have gone one step further and obliterated all traces of anything remotely plausible in a men's action-adventure novel. How on Earth did this get published?!?

Let's start with the guns. The book begins with Perry arming himself with a .38 revolver with a ridiculous silencer and a safety. Additionally, he takes this same gun with him to combat a small army of terrorists fortified in an underground cave. A six-shot revolver isn't exactly the best weapon for mass destruction. But, to top that he uses a .22 bolt-action rifle to shoot his targets at 500 yards away. Totally makes sense. 

In terms of character and interaction, Justin sports a giant boner through a fight with a gang of hungry dogs. Seriously, his throbbing erection nearly slows him down. There's also a woman that Justin has been banging his whole life. She's in the book on nearly every page as one of the surprise SADIF terrorists. She is consistently bringing Justin “around” or “back alive” by...sucking his milk. She's also there for a threesome with Justin and his partner. Justin also fantasizes throughout the book about the time he dressed like Donald Duck for a school event. He also is fixated on a train that derailed killing hundreds of passengers. Every momentous occasion to deliver some type of action is met with these boring bizarre flashbacks of Justin and the duck costume and the train derailment. It is uncanny.

Vatican Kill is certainly in my Top Ten for worst book I've ever read. It is a glorified new inductee into the Paperback Warrior Hall of Shame for many reasons – lame main character, zero action, illogical plot, cartoon villain, an uncommon fixation on the male penis, I can go on and on. This is absolutely the worst of the worst and I encourage you to steer clear of it. Avoid!